5 Signs That You Do Not Love Yourself

It is important that you love yourself. Not only to maintain a healthy self-esteem, but also to be able to enjoy quality relationships with other people.

But if you do not love yourself, you will not only find it difficult to bond with other people, but it will also increase your risk of depression.

You can learn to spot signs that you do not love yourself as much as you should. Doing so can help you improve the way you bond with yourself (ie, your inner dialogue) and with others.

Identifying these signs can also help you find a way out of sadness or disappointment. It can also help you get to grips with things when you feel down.

You question what others are saying or doing for you

This is an indicator of low self-esteem that often lies behind the negative thoughts you have about yourself. This means that you question the feelings, words and actions that others show you. You do not believe what others say, do or feel about you.

Every person wants to feel loved and understood, but people with low self-esteem tend to overestimate what others say and do, and constantly question it.

They think no one loves them or appreciates them. They take the criticism very personally and they think that others always have an underlying motive when they express appreciation.

There is a very consistent unconscious thought behind this. How can another person love me more than I love myself?

How can anyone respect me more than I respect myself? How can anyone be more kind to me than I am to myself?

You’re always on the defensive

Always being on the defensive is another clear sign that you do not love yourself as much as you should. Uncertainty and a lack of self-confidence will make you constantly on the alert for no reason.

And it not only increases your stress levels. It also prevents you from being objective about what is happening around you.

Being on the defensive in this way means that you cannot understand what others are saying to you or asking you as clearly as you would otherwise have done. And it makes you feel insecure about what other people are thinking.

It also gives rise to a state of fear and sadness that does not allow you to enjoy things. When you are on the defensive, your attitude towards others can easily become rude, unpleasant or tense, if not violent.

Being always on the defensive means that you act based on the worst situations that may arise. Your reaction may therefore be excessive and even inappropriate.

The result is often a conflict that can actually make your worst fears come true and thus confirm your point of view.

You try to avoid conflicts by pretending that everything is okay

Another thing that can happen is that you want to avoid a conflict, so you pretend that everything is okay. Instead of standing straight back, you choose to give up because you want to avoid problems.

The problem is that your lack of self-esteem and self-love does not give you the strength to defend yourself. On the other hand, you may start arguing about something that is meaningless or something that is not so important to you.

You are afraid that other people will get angry at you for defending your opinion. This will make you accept what they say or agree so that they are satisfied.

And what happens in that process is that you begin to feel that your opinion does not matter. That no one cares what you want.

You compare yourself with others, even if there is nothing to compare

The habit of comparing yourself to others is another clear sign that you do not love yourself. Comparing ourselves to others is not necessarily negative.

The problem arises when you go too far with these comparisons, especially when it comes to looks.

A person who does not love himself will even compare when there is nothing to compare. As a result, not only will his self-esteem decline, but he will also feel abandoned or ill-treated. This undermines self-love even more.

You see what you have achieved as your only luck. It is important that you love yourself and what you have achieved!

It is true that much of what we achieve has in part to do with luck, but not everything depends on luck. You need to know how to take advantage of opportunities to turn that turn into something.

But if you do not love yourself enough, you will not be able to recognize the value of what you have achieved. This is why you do not appreciate your abilities or your own effort.

So you do not see yourself as a person who is valuable to others and you do not understand why they appreciate you. The attitude of saying that it was lucky when you succeeded in something will make you feel incompetent and unmotivated and without direction in life.