7 Ways To Identify Masters Of Manipulation

Manipulation is something very common nowadays. Governments manipulate, media manipulate, and manipulation also occurs in personal relationships. However, it sometimes happens that one encounters real masters of manipulation in daily life.

Manipulation is a form of emotional blackmail: it is a hidden behavior; it is a way of changing what another person is thinking or doing, without the person knowing that control is taking place.

And this is the very problem of manipulation: it is a hidden behavior that is not always easy to detect by the victim. This is why many people swallow the bait, become victims and let those who manipulate get their way.

Therefore, it is very important to learn to identify the methods used by the manipulators. In this article, we will address 7 ways you can identify them.

They make you feel ashamed and you do not know why

Masters of manipulation always play victim. They have certainly gone through a difficult time in their lives that makes them justify what they are doing.

It may have to do with a difficult childhood, problems with the children, bad luck and other similar situations. They often feel a certain kind of pride due to these emotional wounds.

For example, if you point out to a manipulator that he or she has neglected a task, you may get an angry response in the style of “You get annoyed that I am not doing well enough, but it may not be so strange considering that my father abandoned me when I was 3 years old and thus was not there to teach me this ”. This is a way to disarm yourself. Who can be insensitive to someone who has been through something like that? This is how the game works.

They threaten you subtly

Threatening indirectly is a frequently used tactic by people who manipulate. They have used this before and they continue to use it over the years. This tactic is to show the worst possible consequence as a result of your behavior.

“If you continue to eat that food, you will look like a choice within 6 months.” The manipulator wants you to change your eating habits, even if he or she probably has no medical reason.

The person may not like that you looked happy when you ate a pizza, or he or she may think that you are spending too much of your joint money on food. But this is not done with open cards, but is cleverly wrapped up.

They push you down through sarcasm

If there is one thing manipulators dislike, it is direct communication. They prefer to use sarcasm to ridicule you and diminish the value of what you think, feel or do. A manipulator wants others to feel insecure and inferior.

An example of this is when they send you a message that seems friendly, but which contains something very aggressive: “Maybe you would have better friends if you read a little more”, which translated means “You are an uneducated person and that is the reason to the fact that you do not have good friends ”.

As a victim, it is easy to think that this type of gesture is helpful. Nothing could be more wrong. When you really want to help someone, the communication is direct and honest.

They are almost always seductive

Typical manipulators know that you can impress others by showing off as friendly and amazing. They praise you and say you have a great taste, and they “listen” to what you have in mind.

Once they have convinced you what a good person you are, they will change their tactics. They have “seduced” you so that you no longer think objectively. You will have a good eye for them even if they make you hesitant at times. They will always in one way or another remind you that you “can not think anything bad about someone who is so nice”.

They make themselves self-proclaimed judges in your life

Without understanding how this works, these people become “spiritual guides” in your life. They will tell you how to live, even when they themselves do not put their lessons into practice.

They give you advice or expose you to great philosophies. They give you “tips” on what to do. If you do not follow these, they will blame you. They told you what to do, and you did not follow this generous advice.

A good friend does not tell you what to do. A good friend will help you discover it for yourself, because each person is different and what applies to one may not apply to another. Anyone who really likes you wants you to be free and not addicted.

They are skilled at talking and changing topics

Those who are skilled at manipulation are also skilled at handling words. They use different semantic tactics and they always have a good argument, even if this is based on a lie.

If they laugh at you and say that you look silly in your clothes and you get pissed, they will say that they did not think you were so sensitive to jokes. No matter what, they will always win. They are masters at getting others to fall.

If you confront them, they will probably not answer you. They turn their attention to other topics and all of a sudden without you noticing it you sit and talk about things that had nothing to do with what you wanted to talk about from the beginning.

They turn the roast with simplicity

They turn the discussion around and it is you who is to blame in the end. A classic example of this is when the wife discovers that the husband has been unfaithful.

She takes out the hotel note she found in his pants, and he then starts accusing her of looking through his personal belongings. He then draws a long roll on how important it is to trust each other in a relationship.

In the end, the woman feels ashamed and apologizes for being “controlling”, and the discussion about infidelity disappears as if it had never existed.

Pictures from Art PK and Holly Clifton-Brown.