People Who Think Others Are Responsible For Their Problems

“It’s always someone else’s fault that things happen to me”, “My problems are always others’ fault. Nothing is because of me. ” Do these feelings sound familiar? Do you recognize yourself or anyone else in this? There are many people who do not want to see themselves as responsible for their problems and who can not take responsibility for their actions.

When you can not accept that you are actually the leader of your life, it will be difficult for you to take the initiative and steer your life where you want to go. In these scenarios, there is always someone to blame for everything. Because it is not our fault and we are not responsible.

It’s my boyfriend, my mother, the person I met… There is a wide range of people that you see as responsible for your problems. Our blindness is greatest when we cannot accept the role we ourselves play in our lives. It is an absolute denial and stubborn belief that says it is someone else’s fault that you live with the problems you do.

Some people are really good at changing reality so that they themselves are not responsible for their problems. They are okay with their self-deception, in part because they are so used to it that it becomes unconscious. But self-deception is a major constraint that blurs reality. It gets more chaotic, more hostile.

We lose our pole star when we put our responsibility on everyone else’s shoulders. When we act impulsively. When we get frustrated then the other person does not respond the way we wanted. They can not, or they do not want to. But that is not our struggle. The other person can act as he pleases. We are the ones who must therefore act accordingly.

These people waste a lot of time complaining. Nothing is ever enough. They could complain about even the smallest, most insignificant thing. And they are completely incapable of channeling their frustration. They become tyrants in their own little kingdom. The worst part of it all is that it ultimately hurts themselves and everyone around them.

This has a lot to do with not feeling oneself, not reflecting. Knowing yourself and accepting who you are right now is the first step towards changing yourself. If you do not know what your needs and impulses are, where your actions come from, then it will be difficult for you to find a solution.

If no one gives us attention, we can have an outbreak like a small child. There is almost no method that is not fair in this type of war. But when the other person does not give us what we need, we get upset. We curse them and blame them for our frustration. We make them responsible so that we do not disappoint ourselves.

If we do not get what we want from someone, we will be frustrated. On the other hand, others can sometimes fix our problems so quickly that we do not even have time to realize what we have asked for.

But when we realize it, it is not uncommon for us to feel that we have nothing to be grateful for, because the other person would have had to respond to our demands anyway.

We do not see the other person as separate from ourselves. We see them as a slave who must meet our tyrannical demands. I order and you obey. And if you do not obey my orders, I will make you feel that all my problems are your fault, caused by your lack of responsibility. This is how we think.

When we pick up all the arrows we have shot outwards, we understand the situation and can restore our view of reality. It was the center of all communication with the outside world, the center of all thinking. When we talk about a long-term habit that is difficult to break more, it is also possible to change if we seek help.