The Paradox Of Happiness: What Is It And How Does It Work?

“Happiness” is one of the most used words in the world. In today’s culture, it represents the ultimate goal for many people. But that was not always the case. In times gone by, the essential purpose of life had to do with virtue, offspring, or property. In the modern era, the paradox of happiness takes precedence.

The paradox of happiness is that almost everyone wants to be happy. But  when people are asked what happiness is, they have a hard time defining it. If you go a little further and ask yourself why you want to be happy, the answer is probably unclear.

One would think that the answer is obvious given how much we want to achieve this goal. But despite that…

If you want to make your life even more complicated, you can ask a third question:  how do you achieve happiness? There are many answers to this question, based on each person’s beliefs. Job performance, success and having a happy relationship are some of the most common answers.

But it would be difficult to concretely define how these things contribute to happiness or what one expects to happen when one finds happiness.

In short  , almost everyone seeks happiness in this modern age, but most people do not know what it is or why they want it. Furthermore, they probably have only a small idea of ​​which path they must follow to find it. This is the paradox of happiness.

Dr. Iris B. Mauss, a professor at the University of Denver, conducted two studies  to find out more about how human happiness works. The results from these studies are very worrying, and bring us closer to what the paradox of happiness actually is.

The first study carried out an analysis of three aspects:

• The level of weight each person brings to happiness.
• The external conditions under which the participants lived. Thus social and job position, satisfaction of basic needs, etc.
• The relationship between good external conditions and a feeling of happiness.

The result was that  people who placed enormous value on happiness felt more dissatisfied, even though they had excellent external conditions in their lives. On the other hand, people felt more satisfied if they were neutral or did not give as much weight in the pursuit of happiness. This happened even though their living conditions were more difficult.

These conclusions show the essence of the paradox of happiness.

Researchers conducted a second, similar experiment at the University of Denver. In that case  , one did not measure satisfaction, but rather how loneliness was experienced  by those who placed more emphasis on happiness and those who placed less emphasis on it.

The results are similar to those from the first study. People who pursued happiness intensely felt more alone,  while those who did not attach much importance to it did not feel this feeling.

The initial conclusion from this  is that those who are eagerly searching for happiness focus excessively on themselves. Seeking success and fulfillment breaks the bond with others. This strengthens the feeling of loneliness. Once again, the paradox of happiness is verified.

From these studies we can draw interesting conclusions. The first and most important  is that external performance is not a source of happiness, not directly in any case.

This is why many people only feel a short period of satisfaction after getting something they wanted very much, and then feel a general feeling of illness that makes them set a new goal, which creates an endless cycle.

Happiness is therefore a process that exists within us. It is a reality that only partly has to do with our external achievements. Perhaps many are tirelessly searching for this happiness, with a secret desire to end the “eternal” dissatisfaction that exists within them. They do not realize that the paradise they are looking for is within them.

On the other hand, studies allow us to conclude that the  idealization of the concept of happiness only leads to frustration. Those who accept that happiness is only a part of life can feel more satisfied, and realize that a permanent state of happiness should not be the goal, because that is exactly what makes it disappear.

This helps us to accept reality as it is, and therefore to feel satisfaction more often.

What we vaguely call happiness, that feeling of joy and fulfillment, is something that only happens sometimes. Either way  , the decision to be the best version of ourselves will bring good luck to us on our own.