Everything For My Son: Monsters Actually Exist!

In February, Allt för min son ( Jusqu’àla garde) was crowned best film at the 44th edition of the César Awards in France. The drama is about violence against women and is created by film debutant Xavier Legrand.

In the opening scene, you see a couple who are solving the details regarding custody. Although it seems like an innocent introduction, Legrand pulls you in from the very beginning and does not let go of you until the movie is over.

Everything for my son shows that there are monsters and that they live among us. They do not hide in dark corners or in the closet. Monsters live in and among families.

Sharing custody with a monster

The story is told from the judge’s point of view, the judge who reviews the divorce and the custody dispute. It is not entirely easy to understand what is going on in the case. There are some prominent elements that seem obvious, such as the father’s violent behavior towards the mother. However, nothing seems clear in this case, which makes the judge hesitate.

Miriam’s lawyer claims that Miriam’s husband is possessive and violent. Antoine’s lawyer, on the other hand, denies the allegations and claims that it is abnormal that Miriam (played by Léa Drucker) wants to prevent Antoine from showing her love for her children.

The testimony of a child who prays and asks not to have to spend time with his father echoes in the room. During, the judge observes both parents and tries to detect any visible signal that can help her make a decision.

The mother’s lawyer finds it difficult to find clear evidence of the father’s true character. Harmful people are usually very good at adapting their behavior to given situations.

You can feel the impending disaster as soon as the judge orders shared custody. What follows is an explosion of violence, repression and unrest that is masterfully portrayed by Thomas Gioria, who plays the youngest son Julien.

Hell with this shared custody

From the moment the father (played by Denis Ménochet) gets custody, the tension increases. In one scene, you see a close-up of the child’s frightened face. In another, the wordless dialogue makes it difficult to breathe.

Julien’s facial expression tells what he experiences and feels. The film has no soundtrack, so the sounds of daily life turn into threats. This is a representation of how even a key in a lock can trigger fear in many abused women.

The spectator quickly realizes that this is not a case of “parental alienation” – a diagnosis with a scientific basis that can be questioned. The perverted narcissist Antoine sometimes seems misunderstood. In fact, he almost seems to be seen as a victim simply because he loves his family.

Everything for my son  shows that monsters exist

No one in the family believes in Antoine’s actions. They know that his attempt at reconciliation does not come from repentance. They understand that he is just trying to regain control of the situation. The great power of this film is under the direction of Legrand. The film’s mix of fear and slightly perverted hope will keep you in an iron grip.

You can feel that an intense culminating scene is underway as the father’s excitement and frustration build up. Antoine does not get what he wants from the agreement on shared custody. His real goal was not to spend time with his children but to gain access to his terrified ex-wife who lies and hides to avoid his aggression.

The strategy of getting closer to his wife by threatening his youngest son does not work. His frustration grows and it goes and his anger becomes more and more apparent. You can feel a violent explosion going on.

That’s when you start hearing the doorbell, a constant and frightening sound. It takes you back to the cold room where the custody agreement was made. You can not guess what will happen, but you can feel that it will be terrible.

Social responsibility

The film’s action rushes towards disaster. The mother clings to the hope that the doorbell will stop ringing. She knows who’s there and she knows he’ll be calling in a long time. She hopes he will finally give up and go his way.

The ringing stops but the characters start hearing other sounds. This time, Antoine will not give up. The last scene in the movie is awful. There is no need for special effects or makeup. Antoine no longer seems human. He is a monster, blinded by pride and revenge.

The scene is so real that you sympathize with this mother and son. You are the neighbor who calls for help, the police who receive the call and try to do their best.

There are monsters among us. They may even have the same last name, which is the worst of all. You can not defeat them with cognitive behavioral therapy. You fight monsters with education, empathy, solidarity, justice and intervention. We are all responsible for ensuring that our societies have an action plan against these monsters. Learn how to handle them so that the icy story of  Everything for My Son  can no longer be a part of real life.