Happy Single: Is It Possible?

We have become indoctrinated with the idea that a person is only complete when he has found his “other half”. In fact, until recently, it was  frowned upon if anyone was single at a certain age. Family members and friends did their best to introduce other singles they knew so they could get married and start their own families. Being a happy single did not exist in their eyes.

Now that situation is changing. Being single is starting to be considered a lifestyle choice instead of something sad and taboo. There are more and more people who choose to be single. The number of singles and divorces is steadily increasing.

Of course, there is a difference between  being single voluntarily and involuntarily. Someone who has chosen to be single has it much easier, with less internal conflicts. The person is happy with their situation. On the other hand, those who are single despite seeking a partner may have a tendency to feel dissatisfied, frustrated, and powerless. These feelings can lead them to a desperate search for “the right one”, or total isolation. Although they are constantly searching, they can not find someone to share their lives with.

Is it then possible to be happy  as a single? Can you be happy without having someone to share your life with? It all depends on the relationship you have with yourself. Let’s take a closer look.

Whether your last breakup was your decision or not,  it does not necessarily mean that there was a problem or infidelity. In fact, we should not rush into another relationship. But if we spend time with someone and feel that we always need to be with them, then maybe we are developing emotional dependence. Because of that, it’s healthy to take some time to learn how to process what we’ve been through.

Having a boyfriend or girlfriend is not a necessity for living, just as being single is not a punishment. We must remember this, despite all the conflicting messages we receive from the media, movies and even our family and friends.

Being single is a perfect opportunity to get to know ourselves. We connect to our own feelings and do all the things we hold back when we date. In fact, several studies show that  single life can lead to a greater sense of freedom and higher creative levels.

In 2016, psychologist Bella DePAulo presented evidence that  singles have greater self-determination. They show a greater propensity for personal development than married people. This means that it is entirely possible to be a happy single, and that it has its own benefits.

Some days you will be happy, other days sad. There will be weekends of partying and weekends where you just want to stay home and watch your favorite movie. That’s life. Being a happy single does not mean that you have to walk around with a smile from ear to ear. Nor does it mean that you always have to feel down.

Many  stereotypes promoted by society require 100% happiness all the time  to prove that “we do not need anyone to feel whole”. This can make you feel pressured. It is completely unrealistic and leads to self-deception.

Since loneliness (and thus single life) is considered an intimate enemy, it is important to find emotional balance to  be a happy single, even though you have no one to share your time with or sleep next to. 

It’s normal for our mood to vary, but we can not blame ourselves for being single. The most important thing is to get in touch with our own feelings and be open to what they are trying to show us. And, most importantly, if they tell us if we need to be with someone else now or not.

Social pressure can deceive us. We swear we are happy, but when we get home we cry and get angry at ourselves for not being married and having children according to what society expects.

Logical reasoning and years of psychological indoctrination have led us to believe that we are incomplete if we are not married. But  finding a partner does not have to guarantee happiness. We must not confuse the two. The dream of marriage and children, pets and a farm is not always so dreamlike. It will not automatically make you happy. Happiness is not an emotion that comes from outside. It must be created by you and come from within.

Single life is full of magical moments. O do not have much fun  finding this other person who is said to be able to complement you.

Take advantage of this time in your life to do what you want. Strengthen friendships, follow your dream career, excel at work, go on vacation, avoid worrying about someone else’s plans, etc.  There are a thousand reasons why you can be single and happy! The important thing is that you are your first priority. You’re Plan A.

Your single time should be spent getting in touch with yourself, polishing your abilities and improving as a person. Upside down: you are not preparing for someone else, but for your own life. If a special person arrives in your life, let him meet the best version of yourself. If this does not happen, it does not matter. You can keep yourself company. You can be a happy single.